Rector's blog

I went bird-watching on Friday in Sussex as part of a group, with an expert guide.  He acknowledged that bird watching is largely about being in the right place at the right time, though his expert informative knowledge made the day far more pleasant.  The morning passed slowly as not much seemed to be showing itself.  But that did not matter too much as the day was brilliant, sunny and crisp – and the Sussex Downs give a wonderful sense of spaciousness.

Later in the afternoon we had two precious moments.  We saw a Hen Harrier and a Short Eared Owl.  Both are quite rare birds.  We were fortunate to have very good sightings: they were in clear view for 3 or 4 minutes.  The sun was on them so we could see their colours clearly.  They were hunting for prey which made their behaviour fascinating to watch.  That was a wonderful end to the day.

Memory is a great filter.  In a few days time I won’t recall the hours that we saw nothing.  I will remember for many years to come with clear detail those few minutes when we saw the harrier and the owl.  That’s how memory works.  But I am not sure that that is how morality should work.  Discussions about morality often focus solely on the special moments of difficult choice.  That’s how it is taught in school: students are asked to consider the problems of euthanasia, abortion, or terminal care.  But hard cases make bad laws; and hard moral situations can distract us from the daily matter of moral living.

Becoming a deeply moral person who is upright, trustworthy, wise and courageous, day in day out, is required of all people.  Yet Christians have a particular interest in how we learn to do this.  We are committed because of our faith to want to know

·         what it means to live well alongside our neighbours

·         how to respect ourselves, our bodies, our friends and our enemies

·         how we can use our gifts and our money wisely

·         how we can bring a positive influence to bear on situations that are beyond our control.

Of course there is a link between the 99% of our lives, when nothing out of the ordinary happens, and the crucial instants when fundamental decisions are made.  The better prepared we are to live well in mundane times, the better choices we will make in crisis.  That is what happens in bird-watching.  Prepare well, and you are likely to find yourself in the right place at the right time, and you will see what is in front of you.

Some of this I want to explore in the New Start course that we will be running during Lent.  Details of this course will be appearing in the newsletter and on the website over the next few weeks.

Four valiant Street Angels led a discussion after worship on Sunday which is still stimulating me.  They told us stories about what they do – all of this is moving and heartening.  They face tricky situations and defuse possible fights.  It is a shame that alcohol plays such a large part in creating the problems they face.  But, as someone commented, sometimes problems simply need to be engaged with – rather than discussed.  Ideally, Guildford would not be as it is on a Saturday night.  But this is not an ideal world; since people get themselves into bad situations, they need help.  That is what Street Angels offer.

We all felt encouraged and ready to continue to support with our prayers.

In the second part of the discussion we were invited to think with the Street Angels how best to respond to those who ask “so why are you doing this? ”  It’s clear that what is needed is a range of responses that are easily understood, that don’t use religious jargon and that are personal and honest.   Together we came up with five possible approaches:

1.       “I do this because I believe that God sees each one of us as loved and special.  I am special.  You are special to God” ….. and so you can lead the conversation into how they feel about themselves.

2.       If challenged about “Why does God let bad things happen?” (a fairly common outburst), the Street Angel acknowledges that this is quite a puzzle, and that truly bad things happen.  By this time, the person is likely to want to tell you about the bad thing that he/she has experienced recently.  This approach is not ducking the issue – but people more often than not want to express their sadness more than argue theologically about “the problem of evil”.

3.       If asked “why do you do this?”, the response can be “Friendship and kindness”.  This seems a particularly good approach because the Street Angels tell us that they are often recognised as being kind people.  Moreover, the Street Angels often pick up people who have been abandoned by their group of friends.  Saying that there is a sort of friendship that does not abandon others is appropriate for what is happening on the streets of Guildford, and is true about God too.

4.       One good response to “Why do you believe in God?” is Beauty and Joy.  This is a similar answer to number 3 – that is about human relationships; Beauty and Joy is about the natural world.

5.       The final response we devised is more about the way of carrying on the conversation, rather than the content.  Respect is the key ingredient.  And this can be particularly important when people are starting to cause trouble for each other.  To model respect by being patient and understanding can be very influential.

None of this is spiritual ‘rocket science’.  But the Street Angels were able to admit that in all their training they had not received guidance about how what to say in these circumstances.  It’s easy to feel that the answers given above are naïve and inadequate.  But in reality I reckon that they are good ways of taking forward these conversations …. at least, such a conversation will be as good as is possible on Guildford High Street at 0300 on Sunday morning.

Have you seen that the daffodils are already flowering in Stoke Park?  Apparently a picture of them has been in the Daily Telegraph, so you may already know that.  Nevertheless, I was surprised to see a cherry tree in blossom in the woods just east of St Martha’s.  Whereas it is good to see the heralds of spring, it all feels too early.  Such sights worry me about the unusual seasons we are having, and whether this is another indicator of Climate Change.  Anyway, what is wrong with winter?

Winter is a time to hibernate – for plants, animals and humans.  It’s a season to snuggle down, to protect yourself from what is happening outside, and to conserve energy.  It’s a season of transition.  We all know that you cannot reach Resurrection without going through the Tomb.  So this winter season (both literally and metaphorically) is not a season to avoid, but it is rather a time for patience and endurance.

I have in mind 2 people who are, at the moment, needing to hibernate in their own way.  One has been through a very bruising experience, so he now needs to let the pain subside and to find a new equilibrium.  Nothing will go right if that process is ignored or rushed.  There are times we need to be healed – slowly and gently.  The other is approaching her final days – the journey she has to make, and the transition that she has to undergo, is immense.  Both for her and her family this is a time to be close and be warmed by huddling together.  Other responsibilities can wait.  These precious final days cannot be rushed.  Friends will gather around – not to intrude – but to signal protection and support.

I am ready to enjoy the blossom of Spring – but not yet.

 

 

I was first asked to write this blog so that people could know what I was actively involved in, and what was absorbing my time.  If we only see each other regularly on Sundays then it is good to be able to picture what friends are doing through the week.  Mindfulness is closely associated with prayerfulness.  I truly appreciated the attitude behind the request to write the blog. Not only did it feel supportive, but it was a recognition that a large part of what I do I do on behalf of all of us.  You may not be able to undertake the visits I do, or sit in on the meetings that fill my diary - but seeing myself as a representative of the warmth, wisdom and kindess of the whole parish is important as I do my day to day work.

Perhaps it is predictable and ironic that, just when my diary is more full of "stuff", I can lose the time and inclination to post messages here.  This is partly because I do like to share reflections about what I am involved in, and not merely list events.  Reflecting takes time - or, at least, writing up the reflections that naturally occur to me takes time.  And it is that that is in short supply at the moment.

So, for now, perhaps I can simply catch you up on my major chunks of work at the moment.

Developments at St Mary's: we continue to build good links with Guildford Methodist Church; we have met with the architct who will bring forward proposals for the whole parih to consider some time in February; we are preparing for a parish-wise celebrationon February 5th given that the major restroation work has been completed at both the East and the West end.  All this cannot be rushed and therefore takes a considerable amount of time - yet the excitement lies in how St Mary's might play an important part in the future mission of the Church in Guildford in the next generation.


The next meeting of General Synod begins on February 6th.  There are no less than 4 debates on Women Bishops - each taking us through part of the legal process that should come to a conclusion in July.  I am, with Hilary, heavily involved in this.  The very positive news is that voting in the dioceses across the country has been very stongly in favour of pressing ahead with the legislation in its current form.  Some, including some senior bishops, are wanting to tweak this legislation in a way that may satisfy the "opponents" but will almost certainly make it unacceptable to the huge majority of ordinary people in the pews. Standing firm - gently, resolutely and politely - is the order of the day.

School work: it's just a coincidence that this fortnight will involve me in a number of significant meetings at schools where I am a Governor (Holy Trinity Pewley Down, Royal Grammar SChool and Guildford High School).  I believe it is important to maintain close contacts with these excellent institutions as the Christian ethos in all the schools is important and provides a framework and basis for promoting the Gospel in the lives of hundreds of children.

So, I hope to be in touch more regularly as the New Year settls down into a rythym.  Being mindful and prayerful for each other is possible, even with full diaries.

……. I would like to continue, just for one more day, my reflections on the new drama series of Sherlock, being shown on BBC1.  Sherlock is a fantasy figure.  Fantasies are useful as they allow us to articulate that which we deeply want.  In as much as Sherlock is a figure who can remember, identify, analyse and deduce in wonderful ways, he is someone who embodies some of our aspirations.  But fantasies can also be dangerous – they can be a dream-world that is easier to live in than the real world.

While I was training to be a priest, I took a course in counselling, which also taught me about the basic outlines of psychotherapy.  I remember clearly the tutor saying “beware of the fantasy of X-ray eyes”.  A therapist or a priest can imagine that he/she has the power to see inside the souls of their clients and understand what is “really” going on.  This fantasy can take over and persuade the therapist or priest that he/she understands people better than they do themselves.  It leads to the temptation not to listen to others – for the priest already knows what is truly happening.  But, X-ray eyes is a fantasy for “clients” as well.  When we are experiencing life in all its complexity and difficulty, we can long for someone who sees through this greyness and identify the structure that lies underneath. “X-ray eyes” is a dangerous fantasy for both therapist and client, for it will stop deep listening and respect for times of chaos when there simply is no underlying pattern to be seen.

Sherlock (in part) embodies the fantasy of X-ray eyes.  I enjoy enormously the scenes in which he penetrates a conundrum and pronounces authoritatively a response within seconds.  But my enjoyment is partly a wish to escape the hard patient work that is sometimes required to attend positively to what people are saying and feeling – and the courage to wait for a deeper truth to become apparent.

Let’s enjoy Sherlock – and not feel that this is how we can live ourselves.